Monday, September 27, 2004

stubborn

hi bloggie.. was having a small argument again wif xian today... hai... the usual blame undertaking makes both STUBBORN us to argue... no one willing to let the other take the blame.. haha.. my stupid call causes all this... hai.... anyway.. nth big happen.. juz made small arguement. haha.. bickering if u wan to say it.. but inspire me during boring math lec to write this...

Anger & frustration engulf close friends of mine due to me being stubborn...
Shouldering the blame is my way of being responsible... my method to atone for my sins...
Yet, friends regard my way and method as being difficult...
Intentions at first is undone, & causes more burden to bear, more blame to undertake..
As unintentionally, guilt rides in on both parties and wounded our friendship...
Perhapes, the stubborness in me should be dispersed & i shall exist as a person with no backbone....
But my moral views forbid the exit of my stubborness...
Neither will i seek forgiveness, as my pride is too big to speak of that hardest word...
Sorry...
But my dear Friends, i am glad u extend your understanding for me and i always remember that...

-=:agu:=- The Word "Sorry" is made up by Man to seek forgiveness from others and relieve own's guilt....

disappointment

hi bloggie.. went to work juz now... hmm... being bz at gv... wif sneak previews and surprising results of Jacky Chan's new police story... anyway.. being so bz that i felt cut out from the reality... first, freaking tests are coming up and i haven realli hit the books yet.. then assignments not done.. wth.. i am failing and yet.. hai... i dun noe wat the freaking hell i am doing.. disappointed in myself.. anyway.... requested off for nx week.. dun seem to be bothered now.. hai.. no one working anyway.. schools stress kicks in... i dun noe lah... hai.. maybe.. i shldn't be too bothered bout work.. now so bz le. still work... then.. cut out my social life.. tired.. tt when sms come.. i too lazy to reply.. or take long time to reply.. hai.. felt like a loser.. made frenz think i dun care.. hai... poly also like tt.. suan le.. i loser lah.. hai.. now.. i feel like i losing all da things i used to own.. cash, frens, and if i fail this sem... freedom... hai...

pl: felt sad when i read ur blog... not trying to find any excuse.. my fault for not replying u promptly... thus, made u think dun care... well... maybe everyone is fretting over exams and tests.. got a right to be disappointed.. i admit my fault.. not asking for forgiveness.. but now realli is not a good time.. i understand tt kind of feeling.. i had them too... my bdae used to be during the exam period.. which makes it more or less the same.. sorry is the most useless words here.. Sorry is worth nothing... not even sympathy... the status of frens crease to exist..... for i did not fulfill my duty as 1.. regrets stopped and reflection is done... yet.. guilt almighty lingers... hai... forgiveness i shan't beg... for the root of problems lies with me... Alas, let disappointment rides wif me...

-=:agu:=- For Once, Sorry can't bail me out of situations that made me guilty... even Begging for Forgiveness seem redundant...

Saturday, September 25, 2004

bz slacking

hi bloggie.. long time no blog le.. hai... being bz slacking.. haha..

tue, 21 sep
school was short today.. after school, went home slack then study for CCT.. nth much

wed 22 sep
today got CCT and AMB prac was okay... slack again when i reach home..

thurs 23 sep
school long day for me.. Dr lim post the wrong annoucement on mel.. resulting poor me and pris ended in school early.. then we attended 2 classes of remedial.. haha.. today IMM prac was okay.. lata on had Hi lesson.. till 7.30.. but due to song signing.. drag till nearly 8.. porr xiqan.. waiting for dinner.. coz i asked her out.. sorry gal.. then lata meet up at J8 for dinner and found out got testprint... New Police Story and Resident Evil... i choose RE... okay lah. a little of Dawn of the Dead movie.. haha.. 7.50 bah.. the female lead is damn cool.. luv her stunts.. then the movie a little lan in them of story line.. haha....

fri 24 sep
school only 2 hrs! IMM lec.. then slack in skool b4 going tamp.. go wif pris.. then meet xian.. then went to work together... Emily and Yan Jia came to watch New Police Story (NPS).. then today work at box again... 2 weeks in a row.. all box.. last week not as bz. today damn siao.. bz like hell.. still put me alone from 10 onwards.. poor me.. today.. got no attitude also can becum attitude.. haha.. NEP sold v well n had FULL hse for no. of shows for MIDNIGHT session.. WTH.. haha.. i mean midnight is slacking time.. but this is bad... Francis went down to flr to help... xian, and wen quan at flr today.. then CB left Auntie Sew Kee, Cheow Tee and Micky.. haha.. then in the end bz until, mildred(nite) and wence(mid) haf to help out.. first time see the new gv bishan long quene de yang zi.. haha... scary.. today i no kanna complaint.. but wence suay.. got 1 #$%^&* patron actually made him so piss... but impressively, wence kept his cool.. no wonder he is my CE!!! haha... and mildred also kanna new incident.. (from wat she claim) haha.. hai.. wrong booking lah... to wrong date.. made the poor me do box sales until i blur.. heng no down $$.. hai.. tml worse... Wu long(mildred) meet Sotong (Kris.)haha.. Joel almost made me piss.. but tt time already so much to do le.. so... he a little suay.. coz lata i sort of show attitude!!! haha.. dun care...

hai.. lata going field trip to AVA farms.. hai.. sian... going to sleep soon bah...
P.S. : Yan Jing (YJ) : wat u wrote made a no. of ppl sad(refering to tt sad entry)... haha... i not one of them.. but all i can say is... (hope u dun find me kaypo and start to think i nuisance) u are lucky to have met them.. nx sem maybe diff class.. but its the memories and friends tt u made, make u happy.. and i believe u will still see them in lec... at least, like tt mean tt they all also got promote.... haha.. so think things in a more positive way! haha.. and the person who wrote it (which is me) is a person who is likely to fail this sem.. so.. dun be sad!!! if i can think it like tt.. i believe a smart person like u can do so.. ahha... and u made Xian (if she is tt element which i think she is) to tag ur board! first i see sia! she didn't even touch mine!!! :( haha... jk...

-=:agu:=- ThE FriEnds ThaT We Made TogEthEr WitH tHe ComMon MeMorIes CreaTed, maDE us HaPPy, And MadE Us CrY...

Monday, September 20, 2004

friends,

hello bloggie... long time no blog le.. haha.. well things are going juz fine for me.. time a little tight.. but will start to chiong.. i hope.. anyway.. going to haf a lot of things coming up.. CCT, IMM retest.. and perl project.. hai.. sad sia... y life so bz.. haha.. anyway going to blog...

thurs, 16 sep
after school went to tampines.. hai.. wanted to watch movie de.. but turn out xian not free.. still doing project... went to tp to look for her.. then after tt went to eat wif her frens.. dora, jin hui, yan jing and one more guy.. think his name is siang hoe.. dunno correct or not.. haha.. her frens v hyper and v friendly.. had a good time.. and made me feel welcome.. then after tt late dinner early supper went home.. haha.. travel all da way to Tampines to eat a plate of dumpling noodle.. but suan le.. made new frens.. haha..

Fri, 17 sep
had class.. recieve back AMB result suck like hell.. suan le.. juz need to push myself to study.. hai.. then v sian.. after school slack.. no need to do project while other ppl piang.. haha.. then after tt went to tamp.. was on my way to do some stuff... then meet up xian to go gv together.. although onli i work... she pei wo.. saw jin hui and yan jing too.. then went to work.. then.. xian watch midnight show wif micky.. then wait to send them home.. today.. so suay.. down money.. long time no work box.. siao siao liao.. hai.. slept at 5 am.. was surfing online and checking out friendster.. haha

Sat, 18 sep
watch morning show of terminal. nice movie.. worth 7.50.. watch wif xian and rene.. then after tt went for lunch and went to play short game of pool.. then went to shop ard.. then i work.. siao... today encounter 3 complain case against me.. first.. long time no complaint case... second.. not so much.. third.. only 1 i admit my fault.. hai.. think i still not steady enuff.. haha.. suay bah... long time no work then this happen.. i bet nx week sure candy bar.. sian.. i work box.. hai.. then after work go home.. online le then go sleep at 4...

sun 19 sep
staff meeting at 8 am.. cannot wake up sia..then the staff meeting is re training.. hai.. muz show 8 teeth.. haha.. anyway.. after training went for lunch and went to watch the great challenge... the movie a little cannot make it.. in the end... i treat xian like a pillow and lie on her shoulder to slack.. haha.. thanks xian.. then went home to orh orh.. nice sleep.. sleep until 7.. v shiok.. then online. haha.. wrote more testi and then slack.. watch naruto... haha.. nice.. oh ya.. saw someone wore the head protector of the hidden leaf village yesterday.. wah.. nice sia.. went to check it out.. haha

mon 20 sep
school's back.. then lec was okay today.. went to TM today to watch the terminal (again) wif xian fren.. haha.. xian ask me wan go.. actually having prob deciding... but.. in the end still went.. haha.. i basically see more of xian's fren.. then juz watch the movie loh.. haha... laff this time at other ppl.. the 2 gals seating behind me and xian, their reaction like super big.. laff so loud.. me and xian basically laffing at them.. then after movie, xian drop by at yan jing hse to pick up her A2 cardboard.. i juz tag along.. then went home.. now blogging.. haha...

honour to haf met xian's fren.. bubbly and fun.. exciting and intelligent.. friendly and sociable... haha.. especially jin hui, yan jing and dora.. coz i can remember their names... :p....

-=:agu:=- Words of Wisdom brings Knowledge into people. Words of Faith brings Confidence to people. Words of Concern brings Love into Friends....

Thursday, September 16, 2004

presentation

haha,,, finally finish my presentation.. did a presentation on tue, wed and today.. haha.. then... finally no more project for now.. except maybe perl... but for now.. workload is ease.. after the weekend maybe will start get bz and need to study.. haha.. then is chiong all the way... hopefully i haf the strength and motivation to chiong... hai... realli cannot fail this sem.. i wan to pass and i haf to pass... understanding lesson better.. and hope i can realli strive.... not hoping for high grades but let me pass this sem... even the IS... muz pass.. so i muz do well for project and final test...

hopefully things will be well *wish*

oh ya... muz compliment someone... that someone is Xian... most of my blog reader already see her... and... u shld noe who she is.. a remarkable woman can make me cry out of concern, cry from being touched! and make me haf deeper inner thoughts... she also the can let me express my feelings without a tingle of worry.. i am not good wif words, verbally... but if u guys notice, i am able to write meaningful lines and sometimes, paragraphs... she is the only one who can allow me to say wat i felt or think with the phases i create and understand my feeling then.. maybe the reason is i realli found someone who is most similar wif me in terms of thinking... and the one who yuan yi pei wo... haha.. as in most eng... haha.. :x not saying u guys dun wan to pei wo.. but for me, our timing is the most compatitable... haha.. beginning to sound lesbian!!! haha... no i am not 1 and so is she.. haha.. muz salute her, my PA, barn mate, B2 and best pal...

ps: guys, dun think u are not impt.. to me.. all are impt.. even if i didn't tell u my prob or see u as often, but u guys are in my mind, heart and soul to.. u are my past, my present and hopefully my future...

-=:agu:=- Friends walk side by side in our past, our present and hopefully to our future....

Tuesday, September 14, 2004

fotopic

hi guys.. i juz put a link under the name PhotO GaLore... my new fotopic.com website.. juz a beginning.. will instill new photo when i have them.. go see them now and leave me comments.. thanks and spot urself in the pic!!!!

-=:agu:=- a photo triggers many tears and many smiles....

Monday, September 13, 2004

going to noe new frens

hi bloggie.. long time no blog about my life.. rather juz blog about my emotion.. so far.. the project deadline is approaching and hopes faster finish... haha.. then.. recieve result for IMM... fail! the hardest module of this sem.. i failed by 2 marks.. oh.. nvm.. expected.. hai.. then i got back result of my math retest... haha... i passed the retest... still capped at 50.. but i got 94/100 for the retest.. mind u the retest is not easier... is more or less same as the common test paper.. happy.. i proved tt i failed not coz i dunno how to do... and i long time no get high marks for math... haha... well.. anyway.. felt relieved.. then today lec was okay.. i can understand except maybe aqua coz not listening in the first place.. then.. i got 3 new friends in friendster whom i nv see b4.. haha.. frens of xian and they curious to know who is the one who flood xian wif sms!!! haha.. which is me!!! lookin forward to meet them.. they seem like bubbly and fun loving.. 1 even noe see hui!!! haha.. so v curious bout them.. haha...

-=:agu:=- When you shoot an arrow of truth, dip its point in honey.

Sunday, September 12, 2004

regrets!? disappointment

hi bloggie.. went for chalet.. after doing project.. gracia was an hr late.. but in the end manage to get things done... it is hard for her.. coz she also doing alot... the chalet was okay.. maybe coz not holiday yet.. so play things like half hearted... haha... sian there.. joke there... drink JD wif coke.. haha.. haf BBq.. cycle ard... ferrying ppl... on the bike... but i am glad i gone thru all this. an excuse for a time out from school... well... realli had an enjoyable time.. thanks to all who made it possible...

to tt fren i wrote about in the last entry: the reason i dun mention ur name is not coz i disrespect u.. but wat i wrote haf already put u in bad light... wat i wrote.. u may feel guilty or unjust... i often told ppl to be tactful wif words.. and wat i wrote is i dare say one of my tactless thinking.. YET, i haf no regrets over wat i spilled... pissed? no longer angry.. disappointment only lingers now.. i dun dare to say i v de da fang.. and i agree i v de xiao qi... i am not apologising over wat i say.. i noe u maybe unhappy and hurt over wat is mention.. but wat i mentioned is how i felt..

to all my frens: dun read things on the surface.. i agree tt wat i wrote, i am trying to direct u guys to wat i felt... not trying to get sympathy vote... and i dun need them... i thank u for ur support... sorry if i mislead u... but i am a selfish person.. i wan more ppl to support me.. so.. things were wrote to my perspective... my opinon... i dare say i am good at convincing ppl... the words i used were to direct u guys along my thinking.. sorry if u felt cheated... this is how hitler convince the german to spark off WW2... this is the method winston churhill spur on the british soldier... all comes down to propaganda....

-=:agu:=- Propaganda is just words to direct thinking of others to own...

Saturday, September 11, 2004

shit them

hi bloggie.. piss now.. v piss... wat the heck is this man... project deadline approaching and none of my grp memer turn up yet... wth... 1 on her way.. the other... uncontactable.. wth.. WHO WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL ON A SAT... u dun care about school.. but i do.. shit face... v piss.. about doing project... hai.... i can go home now and pack up to go chalet de loh.. wth... v unhappy... left only the level to scold the damn "f" word... past few days also like tt... hard to get things done.. i wanted to try to finish everything by fri de... but nv get ard it... i also dun wan to care.. but how to... i wan to proceed to nx sem... this is the limit le loh...shit face... damn it... angry... and v angry.. and the work load is not distributed evenly.. but dun rather do more than the other person do nth at all... i dun care le.. the person shld noe who she is.. u haf my blog add... i am v piss... i dun wan to hear excuses.. if i can wake up early y can't u... dun tell me u yesterdae do project till v late.. dun BLUFF.. the part that i am doing is more and harder.. if i can finish it.. y can't u.... and i got a retest todae.. so i definitely will stay up later to study... so dun gif me shitty excuses... this is not the first time .. i hope is the last.. if this continue... u might be in danger... even if u going to be late.. gif me a call lah.. wth... can't contact u... and how... all the info we need to compile is also wif u... wth... PISS... and is v PISS... i will be damn glad if the nx week is over...
*angry beyond description*

-=:agu:=- People don't circle around your life.. You cirle around theirs too... Think About them too...

Monday, September 06, 2004

projects galore

hi bloggie see whether i can update this b4 midnight... hee hee...
had a tiring day today.. slept at 3.30 last night..was on mSn wif xian and we chat.. hehe... then today lec was okay... can do i guess... then now studying for PQS test.. hopefully i can pass.. hm... oh ya.. making plans for the week.. sat got retest... math... then try to finish all project by this week... haha.. nth much today... juz a short blog...

-=:agu:=- Irresponsibility only brings distrust from people....

Sunday, September 05, 2004

slacker

hi bloggie... slack during the weekends again.. when will i wake up and start doing serious work..
anyway, seem like this sem is definitely not an easy sem... i used to haf one of the easier sem for the past year.. now seem like i finally joined the bandwagon and becum so bz.. requested off for the whole week.. last time i done tt was during term break.. haha... got project submission.. no choice... haf to put off... after handing up 3 still have 4 on hand.. 1 more coming up.. and haf freaky assignment to hand up and my math retest.. and haf to cope wif lecture... think maybe.. gv maybe on hold for the time being... i dunno..maybe work for another 1 or 2 weeks then take exam break... first haf to apologise to bee, kris, wence, and vanny.. know tt they alreadi suffering from shortage of man power.. but studies haf to cum first.. if not... the nx one to resign will be me.. think haf to ask my mum for $$ during this period.. hai...

anyway will tell u bout the weekends

fri 3 sep
haf lec.. was late for first lec as i wake up late.. took a cab down.. coz actually can reach on time... but the stupid jam and driver take me so long to reach school... burn a hole in my wallet and juz reach in time incase of marking absent!!! then the lec was okay.. can understand a bit! then had IMM lecture... after tt was break and saw cyndy and seem like she was in a tight spot.. hope everything was fine le.. then after lunch had AMB presentation of PBL 2.. hahaa.. i presented the last time.. so i no need to do some this time.. after tt went home to sleep and then went off to work.. worked box closing.. come to think about it.. got long time no box closing.. nite manager was vanny.. $$ prob so end up late... then was a little pek chek.. coz left alone after 10... i believe i can handle crowd but too much things to do and no one to help me.. then i got a little bit attitude... then think vanny noe.. maybe the rest of the ppl... hahaa... then xian cb late mid.. then she mentioned tt now fri nite only 2 of us.. how true... sad but true... realli miss the time every weekend got peh, lai, rene, siang.... now standard only 2 of us.. even peh work sat morning, mid... rarely nite.. to think abt it.. i only left wif one vacation holiday left to work wif them... realli will miss... the old times can only relive in our eternal memories. present times can only live thru it once, future times we can nv live thru it....

sat 4 sep
happy bdae to geraldene
wake up late... had a good nite sleep.. slack then went to work... worked a flr... angry by hao en.. omg.. hai.. i worked flr maybe once a month now.. then i believe i noe more stuff bout flr then he noe... hahaha.. he ah.. dun say le.. i angry until i go complained to kris.. first time sia.. i angry until i cannot tahan.. dun care.. then if he wan to grumble not my prob... if i can carry the rubbish bag.. the guys definitely can.. even how skinny u are.. u also can de loh... then i haf no objection wif dragging but u dun drag in front of patrons!!! not nice.. unsightly... then... i went in see rubbish bag not tied.. then bring one big FULL rubbish bag to C2 when i haf an empty one for clearing!!! wat is the rational of all this... *angry* then other than tt.. the night was okay.. wence nite.. kris mid... rene box closing.. xian came at 8 but is cb late mid... then lai closing.. alan kacang.. then micky cb late mid.. hai.. dunno how many late nite sat i still can haf!!!

sun 5 sep..
woke up at 2... slept at 5 last nite.. watching england vs austria world cup qualifiers... draw... 2-2 actually england win de.. but stupid goalkeeper... the austria score 2 goal back to back in 3 mins!!! wth... hai.. then did nth much today

-=:agu:=- Small acts of kindness can bring big bundles of joy... Bundles of joy can bring in beautiful music of laughter... Sound of laughter can revoke lasting memories in our little minds....

Thursday, September 02, 2004

projects, biotech fair

hi bloggie.. being some time since i blog.. well... nth much for the past few days...

mon 30 aug
had lecture.. as usual.. recieve my math stats 2 result... fail.. as expected... no reaction, even when the lecturer ask me bout my disappointing result, all i said is i dunnno.. haha.. math... one of my strongest subject in sec skool... maybe not for the period of kwok... but in the end... i am able to do well enough for my o level.. i think tt, math is in my gene.. haha.. to think i am a biotech student.. but.. math has being the strongest sub in my whole family, except my youngest sis.. thus... maybe i can relate it to my past well-to-do grades... haha.. anyway.. going to haf a retest and remedial... juz try to struggle thru this freaking semester... do IMM project after school till the library announced its closure.. hahaa.. then went home... chat online.. slept late.. watch my latest craze... NARUTO anime.. thanks to xian.. and i find out tt almost all the guys in my class watch this anime.. haha... i think.. now is the stress period.. everyone is trying to find an outlet to destress and many of us turn to anime and comics(my class gals!!)

tue 31 aug
wake up and slack.. miss class.. felt like a loser and v morally disappointed wif myself.. i am getting from bad to worse.. i dunno wat will happen to me.. when i was in year 1... i reminded myself time and time again.. as long as i graduate from this course, my future will be good.. and now.. i cannot see tt focus anymore.. anyway.. felt depressed almost the whole day... had testprnt.. cinderalla story and anacondas.. but gave it a miss...watch anime.. hee hee

wed 1 sep
happy teachers' day.. well.. this day stilll haf skool!!!! Y poly no lecturer day/ mentor day.. a day dedicate to our lecturer... hai... had AMB prac and math tutorial and lecture.. the day was okay and went to work later... working at cb wif micky, ann(stock take), sk...(late mid).. xian is box closing and,,, kris is nite manager.. ahha... then.. after work help xian wif her tutorial and then went home.. online see ziwei and kelvin.. coz... nx day is presentation for IMM.. hahaa..then did some touch up and edit speech and see some ridiculous ppt slides.. hahaa.. then juz zzzz

thurs 2 sep
biotech fair... coz of this.. lesson push back... break reduce to 1 hr and lesson till 7!!1hr.. had to attend opening ceremony and then had aqua lab.. then we learn how to make fish food.. then we had lunch break.. during this time.. did IMM project touched up, finalise all slides and ensure all is ready.. then after tt attend forum on cloning.. interesting session and rather insightful contents displayed by the panelists and learn more things then went for IMM prac.. presentation of 5 grps... learn many different stuff... then we inject our class rabbit and mice.. i got the opportunity to inject the rabbit... and was hard.. i not scare the rabbit will move coz geraldene and eric hold the rabbit properly le.. i juz need to inject.. hard is the part in injecting the shot.. coz of the substance.. not easy to do so.. hhaha.. then i also inject our mouse.. haha.. then after school.. meet xian up for dinner.. conincidentally she juz finish her project discussion and heading home.. so meet up for dinner.. today is the first day of HI! lesson for intermediate students.. but haf to gif it a miss.. by the time i finish class.. already end class le.. hahaha... then watch singapore idol result... and then now blogging...

going to haf another 2 more bz weeks... may even blog less... but dun worry.. my blog is still open.. hahaha...

-=:agu:=- someone need not to be perfect to be a friend. A friend is someone perfect in one's heart....